Despite the fact that I apologised in my last blog for not writing more regularly, I succeeded again in having a long gap between posts!
I won’t go in to my reasons, because quite honestly they are not important to you readers, what is important is consistency.
On Friday I was on a course run by Sussex Business Bureau and I was reminded of the importance of regular communication. Louise Fenwick, Zoe Cairns & Emma Pearce, specialists in social media and marketing, explained how social media is all about building relationships. People want to do business with people that they ‘know, like and trust’. It’s the same in life isn’t it? We all want to be around people that we ‘know, like and trust’. Question is, are you doing what you need to do to foster that trust and doing it with integrity?
Whatever you do in life, it’s all about relationships. It’s important to gain ‘rapport’ with strangers so that they are open to listening to what you have to say.
So what is rapport?
‘a close and harmonious relationship in which the people or groups concerned understand each other’s feelings or ideas and communicate well’ – Oxford Dictionary
Some people find communicating easier than others but everyone can learn to communicate effectively. The problem comes when you have all the attention on yourself. If you are busy worrying about what others think of you, fearing you will be judged, the experience will be ‘all about you’. Get into the other persons world, listen, put your attention on to the other person. You have 2 ears and 1 mouth for a reason!! Listen more, talk less. It’s okay to be nervous, but if you keep focusing on your anxiety all that will happen is that you will feel more anxious and not be able to concentrate on the other person and what they are saying.
Make eye contact, it might feel scary at first but it is important. I know in some cultures eye contact is frowned upon, but in the western world it is vital. This is not about starring! Did you know that our eyes have to move from time to time so that we can connect to our brain; this enables us to access information so that we can remember or imagine something new.
Most of all…
be kind to yourself
treat others in a way that you would like to be treated.
The reality is that the majority of people on the planet are worried about what other people think of them! Isn’t that crazy?
Remember the person you are going to talk to wants you to be interested in them so be interested
let go of any assumptions about how it’s going to go
imagine the conversation going really well
see yourself enjoying the experience long before you get to have the conversation
Here is a simple demonstration of how you can use EFT to deal with anxiety… Speak soon, no really, I will!